Hello and welcome to a new edition of Jam Sandwich.
It’s been a while. I’ve missed you. Phish has been phishing and that’s been so great.
I was lucky enough to see the boys in Camden but will really get some shows tomorrow at Mohegan and then this weekend at Alpine. I’m very excited. And we’ll get into the best jams of the tour and all that so very soon.
If you’re new here, please 👇🏻. And if you like this post, hit the little heart. You’ll touch mine.
BUT FIRST THERE’S SOMETHING WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT.
Lights.
So, the balloons. What the hell? Nitrous has been around the scene for as long as I remember — growing up in Philly meant it was pretty much all over the lot. But it always felt rather contained and easily dismissed as just another not-so-great quirk of the scene.
But lately, that shit has really gotten out of control.
First it was folks sucking balloons while taking in a Little League game next to the lot in St. Louis:
Then its the photos of the trash-strewn lots that we leave behind when the caravan heads off to the next city:
And now it’s the Boston police, who tweeted this mess and said how they confiscated nearly 70 tanks outside the Fenway shows:
That’s not even touching on the Nazis that (reportedly!) were spotted on lot at the Gorge and may have contributed to the horrific rock incident inside the venue.
It’s giving us a no good, very bad, super horrible look when we leave and that city’s media is running stories like this. And tweets like this.
Did you like Fenway? Do you want to go back? Leaving piles of spent balloons behind is a good way to be sure that won’t happen.
Everything that happens is captured on social media these days and we can profess how great the scene is to everyone who will listen but when we leave this trash in our wake in certainly muddies that beautiful story.
The way I see it, we have three options.
OPTION ONE: Don’t buy balloons! You are very likely supporting very bad people who aren’t a part of the Phish scene and are just trying to make a quick, dirty buck. They don’t care about you, or us, or the band. Also, why are we littering rubber in 2019? Oh and do you think all those balloons they’re using are new? There have been rumors for years the gas slingers pick up used balloons and reuse them days later. Ew.
OPTION TWO: Throw the damn balloon in trash! If you or yours must partake, be a kind soul and keep it in your pocket or throw it out. It takes up less space than a ball of lint.
OPTION THREE: As you walk through lot or wherever, maybe pick up a few balloons and throw them out? You don’t need to spent more than a minute doing this and it’ll have a major impact — people might get the same idea and you’ll do your part to clean up after your extended family.
Anyways, the Village Voice went deep on the nitrous mafia back in 2010 and it’s worth a read.
“If someone wants to go hit a whippet in their hotel room, that’s great,” says Richards of Umphrey’s McGee. “But not to the point where it gets to be a very controlled monopoly on the tour. They’re just simply out there to make as much money as they possibly can and leave in their wake the destruction—whether it’s the garbage or the people they might have beaten up along the way.”
Sorry for the sad email. But we gotta have a discussion.
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